Sarx

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I feel better now. Thanks.

Just about time to go to work!

Birthdays tend to make me feel introspective: self-critical. What have I done in the last 365 days worthy of note.

Well, in the mundane sphere, I got quite a promotion at work. I’ve found out, just this AM actually, that the “title” I was given is no longer a titular award. I earn more money than others and I have actual duties on paper. “Shift Leader.” I mark this down to lack of communication at work. When the titular event was announce (more than a year ago) I was told there was no way to give me more money because, well, that’s the way it goes. How was I to know it happened, at some point, in the last year – unless I was told? So I was told today. We – in this household – made it through the last year despite some serious financial hardship.

In the Spiritual world, my journey continues although I wrestle now with a demon I well recognise: the “F-all of you” demon that 20 years ago sent me off on a rather isolated excursion filled with spiritual distrust of just about everyone.

Emotionally: Brodie is the man of my dreams and I’m trying to figure out what to do. I’ve learned rather a lot since last October when he and I met online – about balance and about internal dialogue. I’ve learned about internet drama (its causes and cures) and I’ve learned a LOT about my part in the destruction of my earlier relationships.