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Originally uploaded by w.wabbit: photo by Brodie.
I’m on a journey: God-ward, I pray. Love-ward. They are the same thing.Spiritually I’ve been Southern Baptist, Methodist, Episcopalian, Pagan, Gnostic, Episcopalian again, Eastern Orthodox… What am I now?
You might want to say “he converts good” but I think it’s more honest to say I’m on a journey. I am a self-identified Christian (even when I was a pagan!). I believe God’s love for the world is real and that it was best shown to us in the person of the Preacher from Nazareth. That’s not enough, however: that love must be constantly shown forth in our lives daily. Jesus said, “You are the light of the world.” When we fail in showing forth that love the world goes dark. I will never be worthy of the love God has shown me. I hope to find how to best show that infinite love to others.
At the same time I’m warmly and deeply in love with the religion of Jesus, Judaism, not in the sense of being a “Jewish Christian” or what is often called a “Messianic Gentile” (God forbid!) but wondering if Jesus ever intended to start more than a movement, a kehilla, a community which got out of hand.
I wonder if the best way to follow God-in-the-way-of-Jesus, for me, now, mightn’t be as a Jew.
Until recently, I worked in a 42-day treatment programme for addicts and alcoholics. I’ve learned more about my own addictions (largely not-related to substance abuse) and my own co-dependency in these last few years than I care to note. I’ve learned more about loving people where they are in these last few years than I care to note. I feel embarrassed that after 40 years as a religious person I’m only just now learning those things.
I’m self-identified as a gay man. I made no choice to be attracted to men, but I do make a choice to act on it. I seek a way to shift “gay culture towards greater self-esteem and health, love, wisdom, social justice, personal responsibility, and sacred ways of living” (source) I believe it is possible for two people of the same sex to love each other and in that love mirror God’s love to the world. Yup: I have a boyfriend.
As of 1 February, I’ve relocated to Buffalo - intending to be closer to Brodie and start again. There are cool churches there. There are cool shuls there. I’m currently looking for work - in addiction, admin or tech support - playing to all my skills.
In the most mundane of terms I’m 42 and I have a BA in Integral Studies from The California Institute of Integral Studies. I may get to seminary some day. But in what religion? I’ve fallen madly in love with life all over again (just recently, really) and I’m finding out what that means. I’m on a journey.
Copyright Information
a.k.a. Legal Stuff: This is Doxos/Sarx.7 Posted a.d. IV Id. March AD2007. Matthew 28:17 ©MCMXCVIII-MMVIII E.V. by Donne Huw Richardson.
The Software is WordPress.
The Theme is Falling Dreams by Razvan Teodorescu but I’ve tweaked the CSS and the code in order to make it work with certain features to which I’ve become accustomed.
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