Sarx

Intro: I’ve started posting pics on the flickr page (as per the earlier post) and will continue to update them as well as this post with graphics - pictures and films! When I’m all done I’ll move it to the Essay section.

Beginnings

After work on Tuesday, I slept. Upon waking I packed in an insane manner. Then took an nap. I woke at like 3:30 AM and Todd took me to the Asheville Airport. (THANKS!) The flight was uneventful (I think I was the first person through security that morning). I arrived in Charlotte and dashed through the airport - stopping briefly at the first sign of civilisation: Jamba Juice. I arrived at my gate just as they called my seat (or, rather, my zone) and boarded the flight with only enough delay to turn in my boarding pass. Once again, an uneventful flight to SFO. My luggage took 40 mins - which more than amply made up for arriving 20 mins early.

Wednesday

Brodie had arranged for us to stay with his friend Fergus. Fergus had arranged, in turn, for us to stay with his friend, Bill. Bill vacated his apartment for the week and gave the keys to us. When I got to F’s apartment, however, there had been some mixup with the keys. So I left my bags there, grabbed my backpack and (after making a post via some free WiFi at Brainwash) met Scott, my former boss, for lunch.

We went to this little hole-in-the-wall called Betty’s, on 10th, around the corner from the school where I used to work. For years Scott and I had walked past this place and paid it no mind. It looks scary with its Wal*Mart Lace Curtains, the smell of grease and the menu mixing cheap Chinese dishes and classic American lunch fare. We will ignore it no longer: they had some amazing burgers - hand made, fresh, topped with a huge a`mount of cheese and bacon. The fries were quite tasty and there was a large serving of them as well. Not bad for 6 bucks.

After lunch we toured around the school: I reconnected with a number of former coworkers. Then I returned to the airport.

Brodie’s flight arrived at 5:10 or so. There was much hugging and cute-looking in the baggage claim area as we awaited his bags. Then we hied off to Fergus’ apartment. There we still didn’t have the key thing sorted out. So we went out for dinner (Thai) and drinking. Mindful that this was Brodie’s first strip to SF we did all the usual tourist things: the Lone Star Saloon and the Eagle and the Hole in the Wall. Fergus knows everyone so there were introductions all around. When we got to the LS, I was surprised to find that I was remembered by Louie, the bartender. After five years he announces, “you’re banned” and he smiled warmly. It was very nice to be remembered. Hugs all around.

After drinking, we solved the problem of the keys and collapsed into the bed. That was our first day.

Thursday

Thursday we awoke and set out on our first full day as tourists: we did the shopping tour. First we had breakfast at Orphan Andy’s in the Castro (Monte Cristos!) Then we went to the Apple Store and the Old Navy Flagship. We visited the Metreon and Border’s Store 57 for Coffee and nibbles. We returned to the Castro for coffee and more nibbles at “Bearbucks” and visited Cliff’s Variety.

For dinner we went to Axum and had Ethiopian then we walked a bit through the Church Street part of town - hitting Aardvark Books and Safeway. Brodie’s a Grocery Geek and so likes to go different stores… this is interesting to me: I get to learn odd grocery trivia as well as insider stuff. (More on this later, but you do know the secret ingredient of Colgate is Lye?) I was sad to find that my favourite Safeway cookies (Maple) were no longer available and that the store no longer carried Barry’s Irish Tea.

Then we hooked up with Fergus and his friend Danny for some drinking. Danny left at some point in the evening. And the three of us hung out until after the bar closed… then B and I turned around and Fergus was gone… We walked home discussing the evening.

Friday

Friday Brodie and I got up rather late. Feeling a lack of the Internets - the apartment in which we were staying had very weak WiFi (only one neighbour was sharing) - we went to Brainwash for some freebie service. We left for the Mission where we had lunch at El Farolito (24th and Alabama; also 24th and Mission and other locations): tasty burritos and chips. I showed Brodie my old apartment which still has a guitar sitting on the windowsill, ten years after the fact. God only knows how long it’s been there. We walked up 24th to Valencia and then up Valencia to 14th, stopping at Buffalo Exchange (B got an AWESOME shirt) and the Community Thrift, we hit Dog Eared Books and got some drinks at Truly Mediterranean. Then we hopped the #22 Eastbound and I was thinking about showing B Trader Joe’s and Rainbow Grocery but as we were sitting on the bus, my friend Donald called and we met him for coffee.

We met at a place called Farley’s over on Potrero Hill. They had excellent coffee and a couple of decades of serving it. The building had clearly been there from the time of the shipyards. Donald picked the place because, as he put it, it’s where Maria and he wrote their book.

We had a nice visit with Donald that included a tour of the new development on the bay-front and also a wonderful tour of St Gregory of Nyssa Church. Then Donald graciously offered to get us as close as possible to our evening appointments. Instead, we got caught in a huge traffic jam that was caused by the 15th Anniversary Attack of Critical Mass. (Kids? Get a grip: making a city angry is no way to get your point across.) So B and I got out of the car and walked faster than the traffic, from the Moscone Center to our meeting point for dinner: Brandy Ho’s in Chinatown. Along the way several of the folks meeting us called and reported that they, too, were trapped in the traffic - snarling up travel throughout Downtown and SoMa and up Market to nearly Van Ness! We all arrived about an hour late, but within a few minutes of each other.

The dinner at B-H was, of course, flawless and terribly spicy. We avoided ordering anything “hot” this time and stuck to medium. “Hot” tends to result in totally useless taste-buds. We were joined by Susan and Nancy, RJ and Sam, my friend Scott and B’s friend Scott. We feasted LARGE. And then we strolled up Columbus into North Beach for some coffee and canollis at Stella’s.

Naturally there was drinking into the evening but the best was an after-bar stop at a Crepes-a-Go-Go! Yummmmmm.

Saturday

Saturday we had breakfast/lunch at Trader Joes. I love shopping here and they have many many tasty prepared foods. We got some candy and some fruit and some sushi. Then we went to Berkeley and did hippie things - shopping on Telegraph, etc. We met our friend Jeff and had dinner at Naan and Curry. We hit Moe’s Books and Amoeba Music and Rasputin Music as well.

Coming home we tried, several times, to get out of the house and go out drinking - but eventually we drifted off to dream in each other’s arms. Last thing I remember was “It’s about ten o’clock. Should we go out?” Then it was Sunday: the day of Dancing and Leather Queens, although not the same ones.

Sunday

Our first goal was breakfast. That didn’t happen - when we got to the place on Potrero Hill, the line was to the door and growing. I’ve never figured out why the place was so popular: it’s average at best. But ok… so we’d been told by Nancy and Susan that there was now coffee available at SGN between the services and, indeed, there was. So we nibbled and sipped as people left the early service and arrived for the later service.

Apart from any Brodie-related events, this was the big thing on my schedule. This was a home-coming of sorts, and a rectification as well as reconciliation. I wasn’t yet sure how it would all feel, but I’d made contact with some folks beforehand. And so, here I was. Most importantly, Brodie was here with me, as a friend and a support: a partner. In his own way, he was also the channel through which the drive for reconciliation had come. I know Donald and others have read my essays dissing SGN. Here were are moving forward.

I saw a number of my friends standing in time. And they quickly moved in space to give me hugs. I introduced them to Brodie. Consistently through the morning I was impressed with how much in common Brodie had with all of my friends old friends: architecture, music, design, art and spirit. How had I missed these common threads in my own life? And then the service began.

Some new things I noticed right off the bat:

Previously Susan and I were, somehow, the “A Team” as far as deacons went. There was almost never a service when one of us - if not both of us - was scheduled to be the “1″ or “2″ deacon - thus getting most of the speaking parts. I was glad to hear a lot of voices I’d not heard before (or else too rarely).

Some liturgical changes had happened - only minor ones, however. I hope SGN continues to be the place where liturgy grows organically. The current rite seems easy-going enough but I have some idea of the complexities of history and research behind the thing. It shouldn’t be, I think, a done deal - that kind of disproves the whole point, huh?

After liturgy there was lunch. I don’t mean coffee hour, I mean a full-on lunch. This was AWESOME. As we always said after a rite at SGN, “The Feasting continues…!” and so it should be. I’ve heard the lunch (rather than coffee hour) is becoming a more-regular thing. This is good news!

Paul Fromberg’s sermon on Lazarus and Divies was pretty good - although I think it might have driven some traditionalists bonkers. Speaking of same, there was present a conservative Eastern Rite Catholic known to me… I was surprised to see him although I was very disappointed when he and his companion dashed out of the church before the peace.

Another change I’ve noticed was the participation of children in the rite as vested servers. Not yet sure how I feel about that. That’s an across the board thing - don’t know how sure I am bout letting children serve at all: if the point of service is to, as at SGN, provide hospitality to the newcomer, having someone speak publicly who can’t yet do so causes problems. This was made evident on Sunday as persons had to be hushed to prevent them speaking over a child who was trying to be heard. If, on the other hand, the purpose of service, as in Eastern or traditional Western Liturgies is to “Serve God” I’m not sure Children are yet “up to it” just because of their age. I’ve seen kids acting up at the altar in ways that are most unbecoming. This is not a time for parental (or clergy) discipline. Rather it’s a time for letting the child grow and mature before expecting so much of him or her. I’ve also seen children looking shell-shocked in the middle of some complex rites. I don’t think Church is the right place to create PTSD.

I know this is a case of hospitality in all directions - for the kids, welcomed in God’s house and for others who are to be welcomed as well. I don’t yet understand the balance.

Anyway… that was worship at SGN on Sunday. Then there came an odd transition. We left Church and went to the Folsom Street Fair.

We looped a bit: stopping at Rainbow Grocery because Brodie had not yet seen it. There we got some snacks and some beverages for the day as well as some goodies. Then we came back through the fair - fully end to end. We dropped the things off at our apartment and returned to see “Kelly” do her internet hit, Shoes. I was not familiar with this viral hit, but it was enjoyable. She did a 3 other bits as well and then was called out to do an encore. Truth be told she had none, so she did Shoes all over again. The second time it wasn’t as fun.

Then the fair was over.

Brodie and I went to the Castro to have supper at Marcello’s Pizza and to do a walk through the neighbourhood. We stopped at A Different Light for some bookshopping and Planet Weavers. This was the first time I notice a marked change in the area since my departure. Many of the bars had bouncers - which means not only that there might be trouble but that the bars expected it. There is a new element in the neighbourhood if this is so. One bar seemed to be populating the street with very young, very drunk and very straight youths. Some of these were in Marcello’s Pizza, creating their own little drama. There were other such dramas around the area. The same had been true in SoMa all weekend.

This creates a bit of cognitive dissonance for me because the whole point of the culture in SF is a near libertarian social contract of live and let live. But violating that social contract (as by invading someone else’s neighbourhood and creating a ruckus) is what happens when one area gets so wealthy as to have all the good clubs. The people who can’t afford to live in the right hood do come there to drink. They feel no attachment to the area, so they get rowdy, piss on the street and terrorise the locals. Then property values drop.

Maybe that’s what supposed to happen in cities? A cycle of wealth maybe?

Then Brodie and I returned to SoMa for some serious revelry. There is much to be said for knowing bartenders and ex bartenders and managers and DJs. Between Brodie, Fergus and myself we knew most of the staffs present in bars this weekend. It was very fun. Given my current line of work it was also very relaxing! I think we got home at 4. Bars close at 2 in SF…

What ever the time we slept, we woke at well after noon. OK… it was after 1. As we had nothing on the social calendar until 6ish, this was a good thing. In fact, on vacation, it is meet and right so to do.

Monday

We made the mistake of having lunch at a place called “Custom Burger“. A review is forthcoming. It won’t be pretty.

We stopped at the SFPL because I wanted to show the thing off to Brodie. The recently built (early/mid 1990s) Main Branch was a bit of a technological marvel although now it is quite dated. Still, it is very beautiful. I showed B the Gay and Lesbian history fresco on the 3rd floor as well as the beautiful rotunda.

We journeyed into Chinatown, stopping briefly at the Apple Store. We did the Chinatown shopping thing - sandals, bric-a-brac, imported goodies, cheap knock-offs. Then we went back to Stella’s in North Beach where we had coffee and watched the sunset. Brodie showed me some cool things to do with my Minolta DiMage. After 4 years I’m learning to take better pics with the thing!

Cakes for the Queen of Heaven

One fun event from Chinatown: walking through the gate, I saw that it was time for the annual Lunar Festival. While I’m not sure what this means in terms of chinese folk religion (the Wiki does though), I do know it means Moon Cakes! So we stopped at a bakery to pick some up. We ordered two lotus paste cakes. The woman behind the counter asked us if we wanted with or without yokes and I said with. She asked again and I affirmed that we wanted the yokes. Then there was much giggling. I know that many traditional food items come with a “cleaned up” version for white folks. I assumed the question about yokes was one such event. But the giggles made me wonder if there mightn’t be some sort of fertility symbol going on here? We were hearing the giggling of well-knowing Asian women who thought it funny that Brodie and I were buying fertility cakes? Don’t know.

At about 6 we hooked up with my old friend, former roomie and college buddy, Patrick. He and his partner, Charles, took us to Nagano Sushi. Wow. After 4 years of inland sushi - which scares me to the point of avoidance - this was awesome. It cost us $54 for the two of us, but it was well worth it. And we were stuffed.

After dinner, Patrick dropped us off at the bottom of Ord Street in Eureka Valley. From there we hiked up the Vulcan Stairs and to the top of a hill known as Mount Olympus. At the top is a marker noting the geographic center of San Francisco - which is decidedly not the Castro, no matter what the tour guides may say. We ate our lunar cake at the Geographic Centre of SF, making wishes for much luck and creativity. (Hmmm. I just read this Lunar Festival is also connected with the Jade Rabbit… and I’d just purchased a necklace with the character for “Rabbit” on it) Then we walked down the hill on 17th street, stopping for juice at one of the markets. And we did a loop through the Castro shopping district - making a complete cycle of the shops on Castro and 18th Streets and down Market towards Church.

We set ourselves an early bedtime - for we were exhausted after our hike.

Tuesday

On Tuesday we had lunch with Scott and Scott. We ate at a non-descript Indian Buffet on Folsom. Then we dashed - after a fashion - over to the newly reconstructed De Young Museum. We took BART and a Muni Bus for the trip - making a stop in the Inner Sunset to look at Andronico’s - a grocery more upscale than Safeway. I don’t remember ever shopping there during my time living in SF.

I’d never been to the De Young Museum either. It’s like a cute, tiny version of the Metropolitan Museum in NYC (as I noticed about many things while living in SF). The Docents, however, have a chip on their shoulders the size of Central Park: I’ve violated the rules in NYC’s Met. Someone uniformed will come over and politely mention in your ear that you’re standing too close, or that you shouldn’t touch. It’s a matter of concern for the art, of course, but also of concern for your ego. Not so at the De Young. We were yelled at twice - once from across the room in a voice so shrill that people in several adjoining galleries must have heard. I’m not saying we had done nothing wrong, mind you: but please develop a little customer service sense? I felt like touching things to see if we would be ejected.

From the museum we went to Green Apple Books and thence to the cite of our Last Supper: Burma Superstar. By the time we were all assembled we were a party of 10. There was Fergus and Bill, Dan and Danny, Susan and Nancy, Damon and Debbie and myself and Brodie. We feasted on tasty Burmese delights and drank yummy traditional Burmese cocktails. There were many courses and many turns of the rotating centre of the table. We spent well over $300 - including the tip. And we had an uproariously good time.

Susan and Nancy took us to Bi-Rite Creamery where Brodie and I had double scoops of Salted Caramel and Balsamic Strawberry. Although the latter isn’t quite what one expected, the former is so delicious as to make one wish to forcibly strike one’s maternal ancestor to the second or even third generation.

Wednesday

Then we returned to the apartment to pack and out we went for one last beet at the Lone Star with Fergus. We set the alarms for 4 AM and waking, took our trip to purgatory. Details will follow, but suffice to say that as I write it is more than 24 hours after those 4AM alarms. I’ve been awake for most of the time and, as of this writing (at 7:20 AM) I’m still in Charlotte, NC.

…

And now at 10:45 AM, I arrive home. I make that out to be about 27 hours in transit. The how and the why of that must wait - as I don’t think of it as part of the vacation: which was perfect. A long post of air-travel SNAFUs to arrive later.